Sexual techniques can be a great boost to your sex life. But if you apply them blindly, and without looking at the principles behind them, they can sometimes have a negative affect.
You’ve all read the sales literature…
- You will learn all about “The Perfect Sex Position” – This position virtually guarantees that you and your spouse experience simultaneous climaxes and that your dick gets bigger!!
- The one secret move that means you’ll never have to read another sex book again and will make every one have MULTIPLE ORGASMS for hours on end even when you’ve left the room!!
- Three special techniques to make a woman CUM so hard!! She’ll want to marry your penis!!
So many websites sell “the perfect technique” or the “secret move”. But it’s much rarer that they’ll go into the deeper principles of sex.
I’ve found techniques really useful in the past. Sexual techniques, techniques for starting conversations, techniques for interviews, whatever. But I’ve also found that they’ve screwed me up.
My friend Harry told me a story wasn’t which sums this up precisely. He had read a book on sex. In it was a very complicated technique for fingering a girl. The book said that the technique was the easiest way to make a girl cum.
So about a month later he got a girl back to his house and was excited to use this new move. So puts his hands at the exact angle the book said they should be at and starts fingering her. And she just looks at him and says “What ARE you doing?” His confidence bombed and the night was a disaster.
The problem is not the technique. It might not work for this particular girl, or maybe he just did it slightly wrong. It’s his over-reliance on the technique that is the caused the problem. He based his sexual confidence on knowledge of a lot of techniques.
What’s more important than the technique is the principle behind it. There are loads of techniques of how to dominate a girl (Some are listed here: A Typical Dominant Sex Session) Learning about these techniques helped get me started in dominating girls.
And I still like to find out knew techniques to be dominant. But right now, I don’t NEED any techniques. I understand the principles behind it and know intrinsically how to do it.
You shouldn’t put too much emphasise on any one particular technique. If a girl doesn’t want to try something that’s fine, just do something else instead. If she doesn’t like something, leave it. Don’t keep hammering away at it because the book told you too.
For example, in the past, I’ve definitely been too dominant with girls. I’ve been to bossy with them and instead of turningkon it’s made them annoyed at me. I was too in the mindset “must be dominant.” Instead I should have just chilled out and then I would have recognised the signs that they were uncomfortable.
Look at my last post: No teeth: (About blowjobs and biting). That came about because a girl put way to much faith in a technique she read in a magazine. She didn’t use her common sense. Crucially she neglected to talk it over with me before hand.
This is one of the reasons I think it’s really important to be open and honest about sex and to get as many different perspectives as possible. The more perspectives you have the more you can understand the subtleties behind the “rules” of sex. Then you won’t apply them too rigidly and screw things up.
So many gurus claim to offer the holy bible of good sex. And a lot of their stuff is really, really good. (Like the Sex God Method.) But it’s not the be all and end all.
You can’t read one book and be fixed for life. So don’t apply the rules blindly. Practice them, talk about them and use your own common sense. Then you can attain a deeper level of understanding and truly become a Sex God.
And don’t give up if one technique doesn’t work for you. There’s plenty more out there.
:)
I will be writing a post on sexual fantasies soon, so I’d be grateful if you’d share some of your sexual fantasies in the comments.
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